Nebtown Gazelle: New CoD Game Prepares to Defile History Once Again


     In the wake of the success of CoD:Modern Holy shit that guy just teleported five feet and stabbed me, TreyArch is once again grabbing their wake boards to try and ride the success into a cozy couple million. The latest installment in the Cock of Doody franchise takes place in a well known conflict, Vietnam. Following close to the model, the developers have decided to take a more creative approach, and have opted for less what actually happened over there, and more ball-dropping stunts of badassery. The setting of "Black Ops" appears to be in a wait for it... secret Black Operatives placed behind enemy lines causing havoc. On a jolly note it finally accounts for your character's stamina to be that of a T-1000. Following the trend mother of this current T-1000 model seems to have been impregnated by John Rambo indicating that the player will be able to use flaming exploding crossbows. The further extent of this badassery was shown in a violent explosive, but still mysterious trailer. However the mysterious atmosphere was killed by the addition of Eminem's "Won't Back Down". Well that is unless your Jake who probably had a ball.

(Okay Maybe It's Not Flaming)

     In other good news the Badass from World At War, also known as the entire reason the Russian campaign kicked the other campaigns asses, is back. Yes Sergeant Reznov the slightly raspy officer that motivated you to burn as many Germans as possible, is in Vietnam. How does this make sense? Answer, who the fuck cares you have Reznov on your side.Oh, and there's probably going to be flame round shooting shotguns, for the same reason. With enough hope, Treyarch aims to completely replace the memory of Vietnam with the memory of a secret commando unit kicking ass in Vietnam. Many fans are hoping for the increase in full out what the fuck levels in perk creation. Some hope for invisibility, I personally want to see perk that gives players force shove, but that's just me.

(Raspy grizzled war veterans, Essential to a shooter's success)

Oh yes, there will also be vehicles, a lean feature, flyable single player helicopters, dedicated servers, explosive ammo, no nukes, and Zeus' lightning bolts as weapons.

(Totally Gonna' Be There)